Grievin' for Steven

I have so many random thoughts today.  Don't worry- none of them are about districts of my body being violated, although some are too disturbing to share.

I think I'm having mental problems.

Remember this guy?

Well, with him missing from American Idol, I'm seriously having some issues/withdrawals/mental problems.  Take your pick.  Yes, believe it or not, I was an idol fan before the producers had the genius idea of hiring Steven.  With that being said, we ALL know that Steven as a judge was the best thing for the world.  Now that he's gone, I can hardly handle it.  I'm trying so hard to like American Idol this year, but it's really taking a toll on my mental health.  Last night, I only made it through an hour and a half.  I made it to Candace Glover's audition...and no farther....because they played a clip of her audition and Hollywood experience last year.. and then I heard his voice on the tape.  I literally felt butterflies in my stomach... not the kind that you get when you ride over a hill really fast or jump a pond bank on your four-wheeler while clinging on to your brother with all your might, but the kind that makes everything else stop.  That folks- is why I'm pretty sure I'm having mental problems.  Martinez just laughed at me last night...but I'm pretty sure this is serious.

More comments about American Idol-
I have done some research on Nicki Minaj, as I had no idea where this chick even came from.  I have at least learned that the completely asinine accents she randomly switches to are from her many alter egos.  Alter Ego Martha Zolanski (the British one) really needs some brushing up.  Her British accent is awful.  I mean come on Nicki- if you are gonna have these alter egos, at least perfect their accents! The British accent I randomly use at work to answer the phone is better than yours and it stinks !!! Just for your own knowledge, if you watch Idol and do not wish to research this, the ghetto/angry alter ego is named Roman Zolanski.  You are welcome:)

Oh gosh.  I just realized while writing about these alter egos that I may have one.  Oh no. I call myself Ma'dam Martinez.....Deep breath....ok...Martinez actually made that up so maybe I shouldn't worry????  I may need to see a therapist, psychiatrist, or Steven to sort this whole mess out.

Wheww..

In other news...

Isn't this little thing precious?  If you don't think so, perhaps Roman Zolanski will come get you !

She decided this morning that instead of wearing her zebra and hot pink headband from T, she would pull out a very, very old beanie from my early years:)

So, after reading the blog about mom butts and sharing it with you, I've become obsessed with looking at butts.  Seriously.  While Martinez and I were in Super Target last Friday, every lady that happened to unfortunately be in front of me was judged on whether or not they had a mom butt.  Remember folks, I am a mom butt violator too; however, I will be changing this upon my shopping spree that will be so graciously provided to me by Martinez once I hit 150 pounds, which is only 19 pounds away.  Thanks dear for the support and encouragement! It helps!   Anyway, just in case you were wondering, the majority of the ladies out and about on Friday were definitely mom butt violators...or they had on sweats.  I tried to take a poll at the doctor's office on Tuesday, but I forgot everything after my unfortunate experience.  I'll try to get actual numbers for you guys the next time I have a good opportunity.

I'm ending this blog before I share the disturbing thoughts in my head.

Until Next Time...


Ma'dam Martinez